helpful hint

A solution of 1/3 cup white vinegar and 2/3 cup water is surprisingly effective at removing barf stain and smell from your carpet.

Just FYI.

this week is awesome

It's 9:38 p.m. In the last hour and a half, Evan has thrown up four times.

Now carpet in three different rooms smells like vomit. Apparently 21 month old toddlers aren't very good at aiming into a receptacle for this purpose. (Not for lack of trying on my part.)

The only upside to this is that I taught him how to say "barf" and it's absolutely hilarious.

Might be a bit of a long night.

confessional

Two things happened this weekend that troubled me.

First, I wore Ugg boots out in public when we went to Target yesterday afternoon.

Second, during this very same trip to Target, I was caught without tissues and used the sleeve of my VERY OWN sweater to wipe copious amounts of snot from Evan’s nose. Multiple times.

What’s next, a minivan?

bubblephobia

As it turns out, Evan is absolutely terrified of bubble baths. Go figure! He’s got this little cold right now, and last night I thought putting a little bit of vapor bath in the water might help clear up his nose. After I had put the vapor bath in, he walked in the bathroom and eyed the tub suspiciously. When it became apparent to him that I actually intended to put him in there, he blew a gasket. Tears poured down his little face as he screamed piteously. I finally got him in the water but he cried the whole time, stopping only long enough to throw his hands up and hopefully say “done!” several times.

It was traumatic for everyone, but the good news? I now have an important piece of information with which I can torture him when he’s older. “Hi, college girlfriend. I’m Evan’s mom. Did you know that he used to be afraid of bubble baths?”

Now that’s just mean.

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fair, to quite fair

This morning I stopped at Starbucks on my way to work. The cashier gave me my change and then said “Have the BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE!!!!” all peppy-like. I smiled, because that seemed like the polite thing to do, but inside I was rather annoyed. I subsequently became further annoyed because while waiting for my grande nonfat latte with one Splenda, I heard him impart the exact same greeting to no fewer than five people.

It’s not like today is the worst day of my life, but it is definitely not the best. Let’s see the pros and cons, and then we can decide.

Pros
1) I did get to start the day off with a grande nonfat latte with one Splenda.
2) I booked hotel rooms for an upcoming getaway to Santa Barbara (yay).

Cons
1) I am having a pretty bad hair day.
2) I have a zit right on my nose that seems in no hurry to disappear.

Um, yeah. Kind of a wash. Sorry, Starbucks barista/cashier, it seems that your overzealous greeting will not be changing my life for the better today.

all over but the shudderin'

FYI, blogging more is not on my list of New Year’s resolutions (could you tell?). In fact, I have made no New Year’s resolutions at all, other than (drum roll please) to not let food rot in my refrigerator. I hate it when that happens. So, that’s my resolution. Actually, my tagline for this year is really something like “2007: Lower Your Standards!”

And in the spirit of this, I need to tell you about something incredibly disgusting that happened yesterday. We were getting ready to go run errands after Evan’s nap, and I was in the kitchen packing up some snacks for the diaper bag. I grabbed a sealed package of small boxes of raisins out of the pantry and started tearing open the outer wrapping. I saw a few small white things drop onto the counter. I don’t know what I thought they were, but I was not overly concerned until I noticed that The. White. Things. Were. Moving. And not only were they moving: THEY WERE MAGGOTS.

I freaked out and threw them into the trash. Dave jumped into action and began spraying down the counter with multiple antibacterial compounds. In about ten seconds we had full containment. After a thorough disinfecting and a lightning-fast trip out to the trash bin, it was all over but the shuddering.

The shuddering, in fact, went on for a good long time.

I will sum up by saying that if you start out the year by vowing to a) not let food rot in your refrigerator, and b) not buy packages of raisins with maggots in them, then you know the year can only go up. I may have lowered my standards, but I think even MY standards hover several degrees above maggot infestation.